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Future News
Year 2091- Atlanta Oceanfront Developers Reject the Walled City Approach
Claiming that building a wall around the oncoming ocean would destroy the current suburban housing values, the Atlanta Ocean Front Developers Association called for more ideas to save the existing oceanfront homes while protecting Atlanta from ocean creep. Walled city advocates suggested that these outskirt homes be put on the new mega floats and put out to sea with the advantage of getting these homeowners out of the Atlanta District while keeping them on top of the world of nature they most adore.
2081- Great Apple Wall Needs Repairs
New York City is applying for $423 billion to make repairs in the dike/walls that have protected the city since the “Great Ocean Inundation” of 2046. Apparently, the Great Big Apple Wall has been seeping at the core. Many Windbelt congressmen have already stated their opposition citing that the funds could be spent in more reputable places like sunny South Dakota. Said Senator Boone Pickens IV, (R-Neb),”Certainly supporting the NY Times and Trust Street (formerly Wall Street) is a black hole. We can teleport the whole bunch to new housing and offices in Utah or Nebraska for less money."
Year 2046- Contractor Mental Health
Contractor associations urged passing the $245 million Contractor Stress Management Assistance Program in front of the House today. Spokesperson for the associations also said that legally limiting mandatory bidding lists as big as 50 firms to 5 firms is a must or contractor voluntary hospitalizations will continue to overwhelm hospitals and swallow up the existing supply of tranquilizers and antidepressants. An ad hoc group of owner associations is opposing the measure declaring that no one ever gave them a break in stress management in the last 100 years.
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Business developer's Lament: I give the same pep talk before each presentation over and over, but it works better when my people are better than the competition's people.
A partner bought a beautiful gravestone for his late partner. Its wording read, "Rest in Peace-Until We Meet Again" AUG
When I first met the owner’s rep for this national retail chain, he finished a meeting by asking, “What is on your mind-if you'll forgive the overstatement."
Business Developer’s Surprise: When I was born, I was surprised to find out that I wouldn’t be able to speak for at least a year.
Building Inspectors “terms” should be 5-15 years with no possibility of parole.
The cost of surviving is going up. The chances of surviving are going down.
This project had so many late attendees at their daily meetings that they open at 8AM sharp and ended at 11:30AM dull.
Our safety record has been so bad on-site that no one will deliver our emails here. AUG
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