Future News
Year 2091- Atlanta Oceanfront Developers Reject the Walled City Approach
Claiming that building a wall to protect from the oncoming ocean would destroy the current suburban housing values, the Atlanta Ocean Front Developers Association suggested that these outskirt homes be put on the new mega floats and put out to sea.This would result in getting these homeowners out of the Atlanta District while keeping them close to nature.
2081- Great Apple Wall Needs Repairs
New York City wants 423 billion for repairs to the Great Apple Wall that has protected the city since the “Great Ocean Inundation” of 2046. The Wall has been seeping at the core. Many Windbelt congressmen say that the funds could be spent in more reputable places like sunny South Dakota. Said Senator Boone Pickens IV, (R-Neb),”Certainly supporting the NY Times and Trust Street (formerly Wall Street) is a black hole. We can teleport the whole bunch to new housing and offices in Utah or Nebraska for less money."
2046- Contractor Mental Health
Contractor associations urged passing the $245 million Contractor Stress Management Assistance Program. Spokespersons said that limiting mandatory bidding lists from 50 firms to 5 firms would reduce contractor voluntary hospitalizations that are overwhelming hospitals and swallow up the supply of tranquilizers and antidepressants. An ad hoc group of owner associations is opposing the measure declaring that in the last 100 years no one ever gave them a break in stress management.
2072 - Apple Liposuction Causes Real Estate Downturn and Upturn The real estate market is being effected by the convenience of having extra weight instantly and conveniently sucked out of the body at home with Apple Portable Liposuctors.It has caused a 86% drop in membership at health clubs across America. Additionally, weight loss clinics and direct food product manufacturers have all suffered as much as a 44% loss of business. Many of these entities are closing their doors. On the growth side, chocolate, cookie and pastry makers as well as cattlemen and meat processors are all expanding their facilities and ranches.