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Future News
Year 2091- Atlanta Oceanfront Developers Reject the Walled City Approach
Claiming that building a wall around the oncoming ocean would destroy the current suburban housing values, the Atlanta Ocean Front Developers Association called for more ideas to save the existing oceanfront homes while protecting Atlanta from ocean creep. Walled city advocates suggested that these outskirt homes be put on the new mega floats and put out to sea with the advantage of getting these homeowners out of the Atlanta District while keeping them on top of the world of nature they most adore.
2081- Great Apple Wall Needs Repairs
New York City is applying for $423 billion to make repairs in the dike/walls that have protected the city since the “Great Ocean Inundation” of 2046. Apparently, the Great Big Apple Wall has been seeping at the core. Many Windbelt congressmen have already stated their opposition citing that the funds could be spent in more reputable places like sunny South Dakota. Said Senator Boone Pickens IV, (R-Neb),”Certainly supporting the NY Times and Trust Street (formerly Wall Street) is a black hole. We can teleport the whole bunch to new housing and offices in Utah or Nebraska for less money."
Year 2046- Contractor Mental Health
Contractor associations urged passing the $245 million Contractor Stress Management Assistance Program in front of the House today. Spokesperson for the associations also said that legally limiting mandatory bidding lists as big as 50 firms to 5 firms is a must or contractor voluntary hospitalizations will continue to overwhelm hospitals and swallow up the existing supply of tranquilizers and antidepressants. An ad hoc group of owner associations is opposing the measure declaring that no one ever gave them a break in stress management in the last 100 years.
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I love poker but I'm not addicted to gambling at all. I am addicted, however, to sitting in project meetings and gambling someone will get it right.
Getting our oldest partner a cell phone that sends Emails and also is a camera is a great gift - three sure bets to confuse him.
Secretary's Lament: My boss never respected woman and said we did things backwards I never respected him. His dying wish was that he wanted me to be on his lap. He was in a chair…the electric one.
Being a great boss, I love boss's day. I receive a lot of wonderful presents that I immediately exchange.
As a Woman general contractor, we are constantly fighting for respect. The last time people cared about respecting me was when I was a dishing out a cooked lunch for all the subs... And the next time they will care about me is when I die and come back as a football player.
QC - A quality control committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours.
I am walking down the street, and a bunch of construction workers working on a building are whistling down at women. By pretend they're whistling at me and I waved back, shaker little hip. They threw their thermos bottles at me. I sell them on eBay. I think that makes me the winner. Basil White
Americans are spending $380 billion yearly on gambling and that doesn't include construction projects.
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